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Dating Advice For Women

February 26, 2013

Why Not to Get Back With Your Ex

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Written by: Aliza Chudnow
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So the guy you loved just dumped you, leaving you no real explanation other than “we have grown apart” and suddenly, your life is turned upside down. It takes you a good two weeks to become a person again. You are finally able to sleep, the sight of his favorite show doesn’t make you want to smash the TV to pieces and the mention of his name no longer has your bottom lip quivering.

But what happens when he appears on your doorstep admitting that he made a mistake and still loves you. The sight of him is hard to ignore as the smile you fell in love with creeps back on his face, and his eyes a perfect shade of green, refuse to break your stare. Before falling right back into his arms and allowing him into your life again, really evaluate if all that heartbreak and all that pain was worth it. Sure, it would be extremely easy to slip back into that very comfortable routine, but who’s to say another break up isn’t looming in your future.

Getting back together with an ex is like deciding to drink expired milk. Just like the milk, the relationship obviously went bad, so why try it again? Below are three reasons why it is better to let the breakup be and move on.

1)      The trust is lost.  After your relationship has ended the trust you shared is immediately broken. It doesn’t matter if he tells you he is sorry he hurt you, the fact is he broke up with you for a reason. As hard as it may be to not let him back in your life, it was him that was unsure of you.

2)     The romance fizzled out. There are always peaks to relationships. That time when chills resonated throughout your body with one simple touch, or the moment where you didn’t care where you were, you had to have him right then and there. The key to keeping those peaks alive is not letting the romance escape. Once it does and you have grown apart, it is just another sign that you have become different people. No one is at fault for this, but when that distance comes between you, it is too late to revive those romantic peaks you previously shared

3)     Never settle. Sure you loved him and it hurt like hell to be dumped, but one thing you have to realize is there are a ton of other guys still out there. If you settle for the one who dumped you before, you could be missing out on the one who would never let you go.

 

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About the Author

Aliza Chudnow
From a young age Aliza was passionate about writing, especially on the topic of love. At the University of Kansas, Aliza wrote for the newspaper about love and dating. She looks forward to sharing her advice with you.